The Venn Diagram

To the parents with two or more kids - this one's for you.

We all have that one child who behaves more than the other/s and we are all guilty comparing them pretty frequently...

Do you remember learning about venn diagrams in grade school? That is what this reminds me of! Placing one or more things in a graph to compare how they are the same and how they are different. This is about how it appears in my mind...

To summarize - my son has always been my easy child and my daughter has always been more challenging. You can say this is a boy/girl difference, but I have seen these roles reversed for other parents.

From conception, the comparisons began-

"This has to be a boy! I have just as much morning sickness!"

When my daughter was born-

"She cries so much...our son never cried this much!"

When she grew into a toddler-

"She gets into everything! I am not used to this..."

Why can't we just appreciate the differences between our children? Why do we find reasons to compare them? Let's be honest - they will NEVER be the same person.

When my daughter turned 3, this was a turning point for me. I had to learn to adjust my thoughts and adapt to her differences. I had to start being an advocate for her. I knew that she didn't do well outside of the house and she was more well behaved at home. Taking her places usually ended in meltdowns...not her, me... I had to start saying no to activities and inviting more people to our home. The adjustments that I have made for her have resulted in a much happier daughter and a much happier mom. My son has been all for these changes - he likes to "chill out".

The less we compare our children, the more they will be able to embrace who they are.